Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Randomize
