3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
