Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
I love having hate sex.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.