Texts From Last Night

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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.

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  (202): Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help. http://tfl.nu/hn4q
  Replies (4) Good night (3078) Bad night (531)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.

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  (918): I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it. http://tfl.nu/on4u
  Replies (49) Good night (2393) Bad night (4721)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.

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  (847): i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick. http://tfl.nu/gssh
  Replies (20) Good night (3784) Bad night (1227)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am

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  (702): So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am http://tfl.nu/tj8n
  Replies (15) Good night (1589) Bad night (3157)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table

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  (208): I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table http://tfl.nu/g7sx
  Replies (15) Good night (3948) Bad night (1077)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?

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  (207): Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation? http://tfl.nu/353y
  Replies (3) Good night (2088) Bad night (1341)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably

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  (414): Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably http://tfl.nu/eax2
  Replies (6) Good night (1504) Bad night (2278)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.

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  (678): Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch. http://tfl.nu/rrk7
  Replies (7) Good night (2912) Bad night (498)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed

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  (781): Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured (617): I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed http://tfl.nu/ilci
  Replies (14) Good night (2595) Bad night (767)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.

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  (615): I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/1nuc
  Replies (7) Good night (1081) Bad night (688)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great

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  (719): Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great http://tfl.nu/tj20
  Replies (4) Good night (1347) Bad night (541)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.

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  (404): It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk. http://tfl.nu/mcgf
  Replies (3) Good night (935) Bad night (688)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore

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  (702): I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore http://tfl.nu/7m2v
  Replies (3) Good night (1046) Bad night (825)
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  I'll start the recruiting

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  (870): I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!" (501): I'll start the recruiting http://tfl.nu/vx2o
  Replies (2) Good night (1060) Bad night (327)
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  (310): View more from California

  I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now

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  (310): I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now http://tfl.nu/7a45
  Replies (6) Good night (645) Bad night (473)

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