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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.

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• (575): View more from New Mexico

  shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed

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• (917): View more from New York City

  i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.

  (516): View more from New York

  was the water running?

  (917): View more from New York City

  yeah but he said he knows how to swim

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• 

  27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (561): View more from Florida

  Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree

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• (808): View more from Hawaii

  I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'

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• (817): View more from Texas

  I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs

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• 

  23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (727): View more from Florida

  Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!

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• (206): View more from Washington

  The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.

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• (585): View more from New York

  She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.

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• (607): View more from New York

  Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.

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• (252): View more from North Carolina

  Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again

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