well I can't set my house on fire every night
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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