We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.