We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Randomize
