We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Randomize
