She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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