he shaved USA in his pubs
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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