Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
