Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
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We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
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You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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