Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
All the doctor said was why
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
