I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
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I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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