This dress was meant to end up on your floor
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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