its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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