I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize