i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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