she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize