Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
