I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize