she sounds like chewbacca in bed
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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