I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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