But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
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