Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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