How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
