my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I'm bleeding and have questions
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
