Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
