She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Randomize
