Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
