I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
It's Friday. Sex?
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
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