Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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