You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
