"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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