i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
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