you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Randomize
