It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
