I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
