Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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