I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
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