I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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