New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
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