so that wasnt chicken after all
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Randomize
