Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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