oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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