May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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