She went from zero to smokin in five shots
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
