How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
