This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
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She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
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Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny