you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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