You can't special order awesome
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
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She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
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Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
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