Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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