Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  So I'm banging this nun...

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...

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  (847): So I'm banging this nun... (314): Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already... http://tfl.nu/ygf2
  Replies (35) Good night (7207) Bad night (570)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?

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  (630): wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them? http://tfl.nu/up3m
  Replies (10) Good night (469) Bad night (3295) Order T-Shirt
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.

  (1-703): View more from Virginia

  I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?

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  (703): okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar. (1-703): I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up? http://tfl.nu/a4zj
  Replies (55) Good night (11732) Bad night (921)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Her vagina smelled like bad decisions

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  (704): Her vagina smelled like bad decisions http://tfl.nu/m5j1
  Replies (33) Good night (793) Bad night (7719) Order T-Shirt
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding

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  (913): Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding http://tfl.nu/jewl
  Replies (8) Good night (3583) Bad night (1168) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful

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  (608): i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful http://tfl.nu/3xv5
  Replies (4) Good night (1076) Bad night (2952) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better

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  (970): There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better http://tfl.nu/7u74
  Replies (3) Good night (2416) Bad night (1150) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.

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  (617): did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now. http://tfl.nu/raep
  Replies (4) Good night (1474) Bad night (818) Order T-Shirt
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.

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  (313): I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many. http://tfl.nu/e16i
  Replies (6) Good night (2162) Bad night (1196) Order T-Shirt
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it

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  (404): im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it http://tfl.nu/4p1k
  Replies (4) Good night (2037) Bad night (427) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow

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  (914): I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow http://tfl.nu/1io8
  Replies (17) Good night (1909) Bad night (621) Order T-Shirt
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  (925): View more from California

  Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.

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  (925): Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude. http://tfl.nu/h87p
  Replies (7) Good night (1556) Bad night (304) Order T-Shirt
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  (210): View more from Texas

  Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.

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  (210): Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often. http://tfl.nu/cowe
  Replies (14) Good night (778) Bad night (251)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador

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  (907): Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador http://tfl.nu/015q
  Replies (4) Good night (1037) Bad night (241) Order T-Shirt
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  (951): View more from California

  Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions

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  (951): Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions http://tfl.nu/xeve
  Replies (4) Good night (815) Bad night (202) Order T-Shirt

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