I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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